1) For my friend’s bachelorette party, we went to the beach and filmed a Spice Girls music video. There was much attitude, leopard print, and semi-inappropriate dancing in front of strangers and their families.
2) I broke into my own house last week. Least graceful thing I’ve ever done in a skirt.
3) At my friend’s wedding, I caught a third of the bouquet and then dropped that shit because I have no immediate plans for marriage and the other two girls looked like they might eat me.
4) I got sick the day before our biggest summer festival that I co-organize at work. We did an hourly raffle all day, both days, during which I handed out germs and misery in the form of raffle tickets, and ate too many granola bars because they were there and you can’t sneeze if you’re chewing.
By the end of the weekend, I was so out of it that I had to take the entire rest of the week off work to recuperate. I watched two seasons of The Good Wife, painted my nails repeatedly because I could not smell the fumes whatsoever and discovered that the ringing in my ears got worse when I tilted my head to the left.
5) My sister asked me to make a blue, heart-shaped cake for her friend’s birthday, which sounds great, if a little odd, until you see the final product:
|Top: Original on Internet; Bottom: Our version - happy birthday!|
We’re a classy household over here.